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Listening is an Art
By Steve Sjogren | July 19, 2006
Listening is an art. It’s not really a “lost” art – that would imply that at some point in history the human race was good at it. I don’t believe that is true. Human nature as it is, runs from opportunities to listen.
In our own trek forward as growing people, we learn early on, that those who serve their way into other’s lives, learn to listen with all their hearts and minds.
Listening Defined: “Becoming an absolute, 100% audience to what the other person is communicating.” Listening is more than simply words. Much of what we think of as words is really nothing more than a moment of silence on our part, when we are gathering our thoughts for what we will say next in the “conversation” that will make us look as good as possible. The name of the game is always looking good – appearances. Real listening is laying aside appearances, not worrying about what others think of us. Becoming ones who are there to serve and lay down our lives. In a way, listening is the ultimate act of serving at an emotional level in the American culture.
For today: Look for an opportunity to lay aside your agenda. Perhaps take someone out for lunch.
To get the ball rolling and engage the person, ask open-ended questions like, “So tell me, what is it that makes you tick? What is your vision for life? Or what was it when you were at your emotional high point when money was no object, time or gifts or opportunities were no object (hopefully they are still there emotionally)…”
Tell the person you are there just to listen to them, not to gab yourself – that will happen some other day…
Topics: Leadership, Servant Leadership, Listening |
